Being in alignment with your true self means living in a way that reflects your authentic values, desires, and beliefs. It involves a deep understanding and acceptance of who you are as an individual, and what you bring to the table.
In today’s world, many factors can play a part in us moving away from alignment, which can have a negative impact on our mind, body and soul. If you’re experiencing any of the following, you may be operating out of alignment.
1. Seeking external validation and acceptance
There is a huge societal pressure to be successful and perform at your best. From as early as school, we are expected to act a certain way or we are disciplined or worse, bullied. Then there is pressure from parents or partners who mean well but perhaps don’t know what’s truly best for you.
These pressures cause us to lose our identity as we conform to what society expects us to be, and a society that rewards seeking validation and acceptance. They can lead to us taking paths we wouldn’t have otherwise taken, following the wrong dreams because they feel safe and secure, or because they provide stable income and a comfortable life, but lack passion and freedom of identity. Sadly our identity can become measured on our performance as opposed to who we truly are.
2. Unclear on your direction in life
Being unclear about your life direction can be another sign you are out of alignment. When we are excited about the future, we are naturally motivated to forge a path forward, set goals and plan for the future. The uncertainty of no life direction can lead to feelings of anxiety, self-doubt, and frustration. It’s natural to feel lost at times, however, this period of uncertainty can also be an opportunity for self-discovery and growth, and can ultimately lead to finding a path that resonates with one’s true self and passions.
3. Feeling stressed and overwhelmed
Stress is a normal part of life which everyone experiences. When we live in a constant state of stress, worry, fear and overwhelm, it can be a sign we are not doing what we should be doing with our life, or we have taken a path out of our alignment. When we are in alignment, we are able to handle the stressors and overwhelm of life with much more ease and flow.
4. Ignoring or not fully attending to your needs
When we are operating out of alignment, we often find ourselves attending to the needs of others, before ourselves. This could show up as struggling to set and reinforce boundaries, people pleasing behaviours, and not allowing ourselves the time and space to attend to our personal self care needs. This can then manifest feelings of resentment for not receiving the same that you give to people.
5. You don’t feel fully appreciated for being who you are
There’s a saying that people can only meet you as deeply as they’ve met themselves. But if there is a pattern of people in your life that you feel cannot see the value you provide to them, they may just not be your people. Feeling unappreciated for being who you are can be a deeply disheartening experience. It often occurs when the uniqueness of your personality, values, or contributions is not fully recognised or valued by those around you. It may stem from a lack of understanding or empathy from others, and the sense that your authenticity is overshadowed or ignored in favour of conformity or more conventional norms. This feeling can lead to frustration and a sense of isolation, as you may believe that your true self is not being acknowledged or celebrated.
Tools for realignment
If any of these resonate with you, it may serve you well to start looking into who you are, who you want to be, and whether any obstacles are preventing you from true alignment. There are many tools you can use to embrace alignment: journaling and shadow work, personality tests, meditation and visualisation exercises to name a few. I recommend experimenting with many tools and finding what you enjoy, and make it a regular practice as you take steps towards alignment.
Silene is a fertility coach, acupuncturist, fertility massage therapist and a reiki practitioner at the master level. She has helped many women in their fertility journey. If you’d like to discuss how she could help you, please get in touch .